Long ago...

I hope some of you remember the late 60’s and early 70’s. It makes me sound not so bad if you can really remember what it was like (I am sure Grace would remember, she was probably in the process of being potty trained at the time LOL!). Back then hippies were all the rage and the troubles of the world were blamed on them and their drug use. Not much was said about we fully grown women who took prescription drugs as if it were candy.

In the years right before Tom I was party girl! I was young, single and sleeping around had recently become acceptable. I wanted to party day and night! It was fairly easy at the time – just a quick trip to the doctor , explain that you are feeling run down and need some energy. Suddenly you have pep pills buy the fist full! Doctors seemed so trusting back then.

Of course when you were pepped up that high coming down enough to sleep was nearly impossible. Easily remedied however, just go to a different doctor and tell him about your sleeping problems and presto – a bottle full of sleeping pills. And you know me; if one was good two had to be better. If you have seen or read The Valley of the Dolls you get the picture.

I had been on this particular roller coaster for about 6 or 7 months when Tom came into my life. He didn’t know I was taking pills when we got married. I wasn’t really trying to hide it. All I was doing was taking what the doctor (or doctors) had prescribed. But I suppose that I knew on some level he wouldn’t like it because I did not take them in front of him. And truly I took less once we were married. Our routine was more structured. We did party but we were home more and I could sleep with Tom there.

I hid my minor use for several more months until Tom was finishing upon one of his big projects. He was gone so much. I just couldn’t sleep with out him so I began using more sleeping pills. One morning, after working all night, Tom came home and couldn’t really wake me. I had gotten up during the night and when he wasn’t home I took a few more pills to get back to sleep. I was mumbling something to him but wasn’t really awake and I had left the pills out so Tom didn’t have any trouble realizing what I had done.

An ice cold shower and a pot of coffee later we talked. He wanted to know what was going on and how long it had been going on. I was honest with him because I really saw nothing wrong with what I was doing. Tom had different views.

He got me in to see his doctor that afternoon, who – surprise, surprise – agreed with Tom. He said I was young and healthy and I had no business using stimulants or depressants. Let me tell you cold turkey is not my friend but that is what happened. There was no spanking at that time, just help and encouragement. But about 6 weeks later, when Tom was on an extended trip, I had wandered the house alone at the wee hours too long. When a friend offered me a little help I eagerly accepted.

It was about 3 days after he got home when he found my hidden stash – 5 lousy capsules! Let me tell you that man flat wore me out and I don’t mean maybe! I think even the ivory brush was red when he finished. Laws were laid down that day that put the strictest guidelines on medications I could and could not take. That was as upset as I had see Tom up to that point and I didn’t care to test how serious he was about my pill taking.

At least I didn’t care to test it for a long time. But years later as Tom’s career really took off everyone wanted his time and attention. At that time an old friend with bad habits and extra prescriptions came back into my life, more about that soon.