Role reversals

I have a very interesting weekend the weekend before Easter. I saw some role reversals at my house that I never expected. Our neighbors, Kate and Andrew were going off on a short get away. Drew was staying with friends but Allie wanted to stay home. She is 17 but her parents were not really comfortable with that idea. We offered any assistance we could and it was decided that Allie would have her days to herself but she would spend the night at our house. Allie and I have become very close since we moved here and I was looking forward to the weekend.

Friday evening Allie came over around 9 and visited and watched TV with us. After breakfast the next morning she went back to enjoy her home all by herself. Late Saturday afternoon she came back to let us know she was going out with some friends but that she would be back at our house by midnight. At 17 that seemed reasonable to me. She told me she had the key we had given her and that I didn’t need to wait up.

Allie is as responsible as they come so I wasn’t worried. Tom and I went on to bed. I woke up about 1:00 AM and went to check that she had gotten in safely. Allie wasn’t home. I panicked! The first thing I did was call her cell; it went immediately to voice mail. I had no idea what to do. I knew several of her friends but just their names – not their phone numbers. I didn’t want to call her parents – what could they have done from 400 miles away? I woke Tom who, although he was concerned, spent his time trying to get me to calm down. I was pacing the floor and had a knot in my stomach that would not go away.

I finally stalked to the bedroom to dress; I was going to look for her myself! Tom was telling me I wasn’t going anywhere when Allie pulled into the driveway. I was headed out the door when Tom stopped me “Let her get inside, Cassie. Maybe she has a good reason for being late.” I was too wound up to realize how ridiculous that sounded coming from Tom.

Poor Allie, she has rarely seen me mad and certainly never at her but she had barely stepped in the door before I attacked.

“Young lady, I would like to know where you have been?! You told us you would be home by midnight! Do you realize it is almost 1:30?

She looked more shocked than remorseful, “I’m sorry we all just got to talking and the time got away from us.”

“Time got away from you! And why weren’t you answering your phone? Tell me that!” Oh my, I was on a tear!

“My battery died. I’m sorry Cassie, really. Please don’t tell Mom and Dad.”

“TELL MOM AND DAD!” I shouted, “Girl, your biggest worry right now better be that I know. I’m about ready to wear you out!” I have no idea where that had come from – I felt a bit like I was channeling Tom for the moment.

As I saw Allie’s eyes widen in shock I tried to rein in my temper. “Just go on to bed, we’ll talk in the morning. But you are not to leave this house with out Tom or me until you parents are home! And I don’t mean maybe!”

“But Ryan’s coming tomorrow,” she reminded me, we were going to the beach. “Mom said we could.”

“You’re not going anywhere!” I flared again. “I’ll call Ryan and tell him not to come.”

“Cassie, please don’t…” Allie began almost in tears.

Tom finally chimed in. I had been wondering why he hadn’t been ranting right beside me. “Allie you just go on to bed.” Tom said calmly, “Ryan can come but they’ll be no beach trip. You can visit with him here.”

Allie nodded quietly and went on to her room. I waited until we were in our room before I rounded on Tom. “Why didn’t you have any more to say?”

“Now Cassie, the girl didn’t rob a bank. She just came in late.” I could not believe what I was hearing! How dare he! If I had come in an hour and a half late and hadn’t answered my phone I would have been well on my way to being rump roast before I could have gotten ‘I’m sorry’ out of my mouth.

“I do not believe what I’m hearing! What if it had be me doing that?”

“Yes Cassie,” Tom admitted. “I would have been very upset and I would have warmed your bottom for sure but you are a grown woman who knows better. Allie is a child who made a mistake. There is a difference.”

I was too angry to say any more. I got in bed on my side and turned my back to Tom. I felt angrier at Tom than I did Allie at the moment. Tom, of course, was having none of it and put his arms around me. “Cassie you’re not that mad at Allie, you were scared. Now you know how I feel when you disappear on me.”

I wasn’t ready to give up my mad in exchange for guilt so I said nothing. But finally I drifted off to sleep. Waking the next morning after a fitful night I could admit to myself that Tom was right. I hated that I had shouted at Allie. I lay there wondering what she must think of me. I knew I needed to apologize to her. I love the girl and I was worried that I had done irreparable damage to our friendship.

The next morning I talked to Tom as he got ready to go run, I told him,“Tom I’m embarrassed to face Allie. I know she must hate me now. I’m going to apologize and tell her she can go to the beach with Ryan.”

“Whoa, hold it right there girl. Allie does not hate you and we are not going back on what we told her about Ryan. She made a mistake and she has to pay the consequences.” Tom stated firmly. I was really finding this all intriguing. I had always wondered how Tom and I would have been as parent, some how I had always pictured him as the one who would have been doing the shouting and me taking up for the child. Rather different from the way we had handled things the night before.

Tom and Willow left for their run and I got on up too. I found Allie already in the kitchen waiting on me. She came and gave me a hug as soon as I walked in and told me again that she was sorry. I fixed us some coffee and we sat on the deck to talk.

“Cassie,” she began, “I really wish I would have called last night when I realized I was going to be late. But it was almost midnight then and I didn’t want to wake you.”

“Honey, I shouldn’t have yelled at you that way last night but I had been so scared something had happened to you. I really don’t know where all that came from.”

Allie assured me she wasn’t mad. And we sat in silence for a few minutes. Then Allie turned to me with absolutely pleading eyes. And said “Please Cassie, let me go to the beach with Ryan today. I’ll do anything else you ask me to do but please, please let us go.”

How on earth do parents stand the pressure? I wanted to let her go so bad. She is such a sweet girl and I love Ryan too. But I took a deep breath and said “No.” Then I burst into tears! I just felt horrible. Allie didn’t look any better and Tom came in to find us both upset.

Allie had tears in her eyes as she told Tom she was afraid Ryan was going to be mad at her for messing up their day. Tom told her “Don’t worry; we men get over being mad at the women we care about pretty quickly. You’ll see.”

And when Ryan arrived about an hour later she found out Tom was right. I tell you more about their day later.

Five things I love

...about my husband.

I love the way Tom looks for me. When we are at a gathering I can slip to the side of a room and just watch Tom. Within ten or fifteen minutes he will be scanning the room for me. I love the look I get when he spots me, his smile, the light in his eyes, I know I am completely loved. Not long ago we had all four couples visiting us. I had stepped into the bedroom while Tom had gone outside. When he came in the other 8 were in the living room along with Willow ands 2 of the 3 cats. Tom scanned the crowded room and his first comment was “Where is everyone?”

I love the way he cares for me. Tom treats me like a queen. He does the cooking in the family. He pampers me often bring me breakfast in bed when he is home. He sometimes gives me luxurious baths that are just this side of heaven. One of my favorite things is when he reads to me. I love his voice, I love to be able to close my eyes and let is voice pore over me.

**I love that Tom is consistent. It doesn’t always work in my favor but I still love it. He spanked me for the first time nearly 40 years ago for cussing; if I were to say the same thing today he would up-end me and paddle me just as hard. But I always know where I stand with Tom. I know how he will react in most situations. This does make it easy to stay out of trouble – at least I suppose it would, I’ve never actually tried.

**I love that he insists that I be a lady. I certainly haven’t always liked this but when Tom first came into my life I was horrible. I bullied people; my language would have made a sailor blush, my conduct was atrocious! I was living life totally on the edge and putting myself in unbelievable danger. No one was brave enough or cared enough to even try to stop me. For some unimaginable reason Tom did care enough and he was very brave. I really like myself better as I am now.

**I love that Tom spanks me. Okay, there have certainly been times when I would have said this but as all of you out here know spanking brings couples closer together. Although I share this with you out here, it is still something private between Tom and me. It’s something that not every couple shares or would even understand. I like having this special bond with him and with only rare exception these days our spanking are definitely on the fun/erotic side.

** These are things about my husband that also annoy the heck out of me sometimes!!

Popping in with a meme

It's been forever since I did a meme. And to show you what old age does to you I have to tell you that I filled this out the several days ago and now I can't, for the life of me, remember from whom I have stolen it. So my thanks to whomever posted it originally.

1. What curse word do you use the most? – None if Tom is around and usually nothing worse that damn or hell if he’s not.

2. Do you own an ipod? – I do.

3. What person on your friends-list do you talk to the most? – I talk to Tom the most

4. What time is your alarm clock set to? – My what? Why would I need an alarm clock? I’m married!

5. Do you still remember the first person you kissed? – Yes but it’s not a fond memory.

6. Do you remember where you were on September 11th, 2001? – I was home with Tom

7. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? – Oh, I’d rather be in it

8. What was the last movie you watched? – Bridges of Madison County

9. Do any of your friends have children? – Many

10. Has anyone ever called you lazy? – Not to my face

11. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep? – Rarely

12. What CD is currently in your CD player? – A CD that my neighbor Allie made for me of her favorite songs.

13. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? – If I were going to just drink it, chocolate.

14. Has anyone told you a secret this week? – Yes

15. When was the last time you had Starbucks? –Last Wednesday

16. Can you whistle? – I can, Tom does not think its lady like so I tend to whistle around him to annoy him.

17. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? – Their eyes

18. What are you looking forward to? – Summer, I want to talk the boat out and spend more time in and on the water.

19. Did you watch cartoons as a child? - No

20. Do you own any band t-shirts? – Any what?

21. What will you be doing in one hour? – Walking Willow

22. Is anyone in love with you? – I surely hope so.

23. What was the last song you heard? – Breathe (2 AM)

24. Last time you cried? – Not in a while

25. Desktop computer or a laptop? –Oh, laptop for sure.

26. Are you currently wanting any piercing or tattoos? – LOL! Wouldn’t do me any good to want it. It won’t happen!

27. What's the weather like? It’s been cloudy for several days.

28. Would you ever date a girl/guy covered in tattoos? – Nope, I’m married.

29. What did you do before this? – read some blogs.

30. When is the last time you slept on the floor? – The last time I slept on the floor is not something I want to remember, more than 35 years ago.

31. How many hours of sleep do you need to function? – As many as I can get!

32. Do you eat breakfast daily? – I do.

33. Are your days fast-paced? – No, most of the time they are serenely slow.

34. What did you do last night? Ate out with friends

35. Do you use sarcasm? – Sometimes, rarely with Tom. He doesn’t find it nearly as amusing as I do.

36. How old will you be turning on your next birthday? - 69

37. Are you picky about spelling and grammar? – I wouldn’t say picky.

38. Have you ever been to Six Flags? – No, I haven’t had the pleasure.

39. Do you get along better with the same sex or the opposite sex? – Hmmm… I would have to say I usually get along better with men.

40. Do you like mustard? – No

41. Do you sleep on your side? – Sometimes

42. Do you watch the news? – Unfortunately yes.

43. How did you get one of your scars? – Gallbladder surgery

44. Who was the last person to make you mad? – Well who do you think? My bossy, overbearing, over protective husband that I love to death!